Wednesday, February 6, 2013

When my heart is overwhelmed

A song arrested my attention recently, and though I have heard it a number of times – I still cried.  I know that we are all busy and you may be tempted to just skim this post, but consider the words of this song.  See if they don't touch you as well.

If  my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear your voice
I hold on to what is true, though I cannot see
If the storms of life they come and the road ahead gets steep
 I will lift these hands in faith- I will believe
I remind myself of all that you’ve done
And the life I live because of your Son
Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am yours, I am forever yours
Mountain high or valley low
I sing out, remind my soul, that I am yours I am forever yours
When my heart is filled with hope and every promise comes my way
When I feel your hands of grace rest upon me
Staying desperate for you God
Staying humble at your feet
I will lift these hands in praise
I will believe
                                -Brian Johnson from his Love Came Down album

Aren’t you glad God gave us music?  A song can be used by the Holy Spirit to stir us, encourage us, even  rebuke us – especially when intertwined with the the truth of God’s Word.

What I love about this song is how it points to the cross.  The life I currently live is only because of what He did for me. 
 I can feel like nobody understands what I’m going through. . .
 and I picture God, becoming a lowly human being (born into poverty by today’s standards) to save me from my sins (ugly, -spit in His face- sin).  
 He gets me.  He understands me more than I understand myself (seriously).   
And leaving heaven behind, He came to earth to live the perfect life and die for me.
 That is love. That is real. That is my Savior.

I don’t know what you are facing today.  But I know what my days look like sometimes (yup
I know you may think a pastor's family is supposed to be always happy and smiling, but I see no verses in Scripture promising a special protective bubble for us).   And I have found that when life has me feeling raw and helpless – I have two choices.  I can dwell on my circumstances or I can believe.  People will disappoint us, most sadly, even fellow believers will.  I can still believe in the God of all comfort.  Life can be “easy” at times with the apparent showers of blessings.  I can still believe and remain “desperate” for Him.  I still need Him.  Even though the trials and worries of life may fill my mind and compete for my attention, I can still believe.

But the problem is that I am not done “licking my wounds” and feeling sorry for myself.  Though I should be contemplating Him I am instead too busy figuring out the finer points of my discouragement.  So would I be ashamed if God knew what I was spending my time worrying about?   Oh, wait, He already knows.  And the more time I spend in my discouragement in my mind, it WILL pour out in my speech.  

Consider this-

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.  Psalm 19:14

When I am spending time meditating on Christ, then when discouragement and trials come, I can confidently say "I believe."  And they're not just words.  At my very core, those thoughts that I share with no one and am even embarrassed to cry out before God-- affirm a wholehearted trust in His goodness.  It is only then that I can be the wife, mom, believer, and yes, pastor’s wife I was meant to be.

1 comment:

  1. Very encouraging thanks for posting!


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